How to Deal

Hey this is a post that I wrote a couple months ago, I don't know why I didn't post it but this little treasure is something for each of you to enjoy. I'm back baby, speak to yall soon.

As I have been treking my way through the Psalms I have realized so many new feelings and possibilities when it comes to dealing with affliction. In just about every Psalm David is crying out to God for help or a reminder at least that God has not forgot him. Seeing David in his agony and attempting to understand why he was writing this, I have come to understand maybe just a little bit better, this mess that we like to call life.
I don't want to say this is a formula but just a trend that I have noticed within my own personal life as well as others that I haved observed or shared this idea with. When we feel like the world is dumping on us and we don't know why, the big picture of our lives seems to get smaller and smaller. And those quick fixes or fast pleasures seem so valid within our lives. We see something that will take the pain away at least for a little bit of time and that is attractive to us. We forget that our sin, our world since the fall of man has always been about pain with a hint of pleasure. I once heard someone refer to the effects of sin like a mirror. We were made to glorify God, to mirror God's greatness, why do you think we were made in His image?
Man used to have an intimate relationship with God, that is until we made the conscious choice that a relationship with God was not enough. We were not satisfied in purely resembling the image of God, we wanted to be like God. This I feel was the first yearning for scientific discovery, Man wanted to understand it all. Before the fall we understood good but had no idea that evil could exist within the world. We had to know what else could be out ther and needless to say we are still chewing what Adam had bitten off. We lost that connection with God, we were no long able to be around each other. That doesn't mean we never stopped looking for that feeling we had when we were connected with Him. Instead of seeing God however all that we see is our own image and somewhere within each of us we are mocked by it.
The image of God is still present within the mirror, but instead of finding joy in our reflection all we see is the imperfections that sin has left marked over our lives. Our emberassments come flooding back and we are forced to relive our shame. I suppose that is why we try to find anything and everything to cope with the pain. When all we can see is our imprefections and emberassments the world can seem a very small place and we feel that since we have knowledge of good and evil now we can predict what is best for ourselves, and that just digs the hole deeper and deeper.
I have found that within affliction and tragedy that we encounter is that when we cry out, when we have had enough of carrying out own burden and ask God to aleviate just a little bit, we are the most honest not only with ourselves but with God. It is not until that serene moment of humility hits us however that we are willing to accept the truth, we are willing to open the curtain and see God. The problem with truth however is that it will most of the time come with at least a very painful taste to it. I think that is because the perfection that truth embodies is something that we are not prepared within our current state. We see that perfection in front of us and suddenly we are looking in the mirror again, seeing every single imperfection and flaw within ourselves. Our sin pulls to the forefront and we are reminded of the loss. It is in this most honest state then that we are willing to accept what God has prepared for us.
Are we willing to accept the bitter taste of truth so that we can become closer to the one whose image we bear?
Are we willing to see past our humanity to that image of God that lies within each of us?
Are we willing to remember that because we carry that image that we have a indelible purpose on this Earth?

I am, are you?

Cj- out

Mylife.now

It has been precisely to long since I last shared my life in any other forum but a message to Jr. High students or over coffee or communion. Which is a shame because so much has happened in my life that I have not shared with this forum and if nothing else selfishly it helps me to actually see my thoughts, to organize and correlate them some how. I can pull those tangents that exist in my brain into some sort or cohesive rational paradigm that I can then share with people.

In the past two months of my life I have gone from being a fairly well paid babysitter (substitute) to coming on part time in the Church as a point person for a Jr. High Ministry. So I have traded in my amateur status to become a professional, it is a shame the Olympics were just around the corner. Since I accepted this position my nights have become restless as sleep does not come easily. I have so many ideas and thoughts and desires that I get to excited with everything and anything that will happen with Gods ministry at Central. I have also felt the exhaustion that comes with constantly casting a shared vision as well. It is a good kind of tired however.

I have come to find only one true desire as I spend time with these student’s, I pray that my children will be as hungry for the word as these students are. The student’s that have been placed at Central are some of the most amazing people I have met. They thirst for God’s word, to know how to read it, to understand what the author is saying to them and most importantly to take what they know and do something with it. The question my Pop has been asking me since I graduated school is “What are you doing with what you know?” I think he might just be trying to see if he is getting his money’s worth out of my college education. I think he has a point though. We desire to be so smart, to have all of this knowledge about the world and to sound so educated, but we sit up high on our thrones of knowledge and are just to high up to actually do anything with it. We waste what we know when we do this. They are like mist that will dissipate when the sunlight touches it.

About four months ago my Dad asked me to help move my (Uncle Andy who is my Grandpa’s brother) from one apartment to another. This was nothing new to me, once my Dad saw I was able to carry twenty pounds easily he has volunteered me to help move anyone and anything. So I went begrudgingly to move my uncle. Now this sounds like one of those stories where someone goes against their will to do a task and then finds joy it, don’t worry this story is not one of those. As we got to his apartment we had to force our way through the doorway (there was to much clutter behind it to just open it) as you walked in there was mounds of garbage as far as the eyes could see, mostly piled up in the middle of the room nearly four feet high. But surrounding this trash were stacks and stacks of books outlining every area in this one bedroom apartment, even the bathroom. All that was visible was a place to use the toilet, the shower was filled with book, and there was no kitchen visible to the human eye. It immediately made me sad, because here was all of this knowledge that was rotting. My uncle had absorbed it and held it for himself. The books reminded him of what he knew, and sadly the trash could only reminded him of what he did with it.

Several things have changed in my perspective since that time, I used to value books the same way, for people to come in and say “wow you read all of these!” It would make me feel good about myself, but even though my collection of books is very little I can’t imagine holding onto this knowledge. Because I have been fortunate enough to acquire it I must share it. Since then I have sought that once I finished a book, even after I have just gotten the main idea, if there is someone that that book could affect then I have no need for my book. I’ve already been affected by that knowledge why shouldn’t I pass it along. I think this is what each of us are called into, once we have the privilege of understanding or learning something, to share it. To let that life changing knowledge change our very perspective on life and share it with whoever will listen. Not so that they may think we are smart but just so they know there is another perspective, dream, vision, idea, etc. that is out there. We can’t let what we know end with us. It can’t be treasured by just us but shared for all to see.

Remember to take pictures because you only go around once

Cj - out